• Natalie Portman needs to get cut.  She was flirting with Robert Pattinson at the Vanity Fair Oscar Party.  According to Rob’s friend, “She seemed really into him, and went right up to say hello once she spotted him.  She was batting those beautiful eyelashes at Pattinson, and he seemed to be enjoying every minute of it. And there were a lot of minutes.”  Seriously, life is so not fair sometimes.  Not only is she gorgeous, she looks like she’s the kind of girl who doesn’t have to worry about her weight, she’s Ivy League educated, she’s a talented actress and, as if that wasn’t enough, she get’s to run her hands through his greasy hair.  The clip above is his presentation at the Oscars.  He wasn’t that great but if you stare at the clip from the right angle, he looks like he’s F-ing you with his eyes.
• Papa Spears told the court that Adnan and Sam Lufti gave Britney a pre-paid cell phone to call them in a bid to undermine her conservatorship.  Those two are like roaches.  You think you’ve squashed them but then they start to wiggle again, flip themselves back over and scurry off to prepare for the next battle.
• This is the best news I’ve heard all day - Ron Howard confirmed that the Arrested Development movie is definitely going to happen.  Although, he did refuse to say which actors were going to be involved.
• Tyra Banks continues to ride the crazy train.  In the latest casting call for America’s Next Top Model Season 13, the producers ask for models who are 5′7″ or below.  Yes, you read that right.  5′7″ and BELOW.  Maybe if I start to starve myself now…OOH, or I could stop dieting and put on more weight and be the plus sized girl.  Hmm…

The “Arrested Development” movie rumors are picking up steam again.  Cord Jefferson over at MollyGood says that Jeffrey Tambor (he played the Bluth patriarch) told him on the red carpet that he had just spoken to the show’s creator Mitch Hurwitz and the movie is back on!  If this is true, it would be very exciting.

Is it wrong that I want to do dirty things with Michael Cera?  He just seems like the type of guy that you could do wretched things to during sex and then laugh about it together afterwards.  Ah, romance.

Don’t get me wrong.  I also want to take a ride with Jason Bateman.  There have been rumors for year that he’s packing something serious.  That said, I still kinda prefer the 20 year old nerdy kid.